I stole this from masikarain, because this is too funny

[X] I have walked into a glass/screen door.
(This hurts a lot more then it looks on TV)

[X] I have tripped on my shoelace and fallen on my face.
(I should have seen it coming)

[X] I have choked on my own spit.
(...)

[ ] I've seen the Matrix a bunch of times and still don't get it.

[ ] I type only with my pointer fingers.

[ ] I have accidently caught something on fire.

[ ] I've told a cop to freak off and gotten screwed for it.
(I'm too afraid of cops to do this)

[X] I attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidently went into my nose, rather than my mouth.
(another ...)

[X] sometimes when I think of something funny, I laugh out loud and people look at me weird.
(It's too funny for me to contain)

[X] I've caught myself drooling.
(But no one has caught me so it doesn't count!!)

[ ] I've accidently caused an explosion.

[X] if someone says the word "fart", I cant help but laugh.
(Not all the time)

[X] I've turned into a "do not enter" one way road plenty of times.
(OH GOD, don't remind me!)

[X] sometimes I just stop thinking & zone out.
(I dedicate a time of the day to it)

[ ] it is POSSIBLE to lick your elbow.
(I tried; I failed)

[ ] I just tried to lick my elbow.
(I gave up years ago)

[ ] people often shake their heads and walk away from me.
(Normally they just run)

[X] people often tell me to use my "inside voice".
(Haha, yeah, a buncha times! I can be really loud when I want to!)

[ ] gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking.
(I don't chew gum so...no.)

[ ] I've used my fingers to do simple math.

[X] I've jumped off a moving vehicle.
(What I've done with moving vehicles makes this look like a piece of cake)

[ ] I ate a bug for $5 or less.
(I remember someone doing this)

[X] I'm taking this test when i should be doing something more important.
(...)

[ ] I repost chain letters because im scared of what they threaten will happen if i dont.
(I make my own involving things around the subject of"Send me this again, and I'll fuck your eye"...Don't send me chain letters.)

[ ] I've done some things really stupid while I was drunk.
(I watch people do stupid things while drunk)

[ ] I've ran around naked when I was drunk.

[ ] ive ran into a golfcart tire when i was drunk.

[X] I've searched all over the place for something, and then realized it was in my hand the whole time.
(In my hair)

[X] I accidentally break a lot of things.
(Do not give me expensive things. It's just a waist)

[ ] my friends know not to use big words around me.

[ ] my friends like me because I'm fun to laugh at.

[X] I move my head to the side when im confused.
(*moves head to the side*)

[ ] sometimes I start telling a story and suddenly forget what I'm talking about.

[X] I've fallen out of my chair before.
(And through a chair)

[X] when I'm laying in bed, I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.
(It's funny what you can actually see)

Total score: 17

Congrats, I'm a retard